Thursday, December 27, 2007

Are you Dating with Pizzaz?

By Judith Sherven, PhD and Jim Sniechowski, PhD

There are six truths that can make your love life far more fabulous. Keep these in mind - and you’ll be on your way to having the most fabulous dating experience possible.
1. You Can't Really Be Rejected
When you start to feel rejected, re-think the idea. Just because you
don’t like asparagus doesn’t mean the asparagus feels rejected. It knows
it’s only the gourmet who will appreciate its special taste.
2. Expectations Are Dangerous
The other person is not you and will always flunk your test when you
expect that he or she will match your expectations. The fun of meeting new
people is in finding out about their unique interests, life history, and how
your life can be enhanced from knowing them.
3. Everyone Has Been Wounded
Men and women are from Earth. We are not aliens from different planets.
Remember that everyone has been wounded in their lives and what you see on
the surface is often misleading.
4. Why Pretend
The best and easiest way to find out if someone is really interested in
you is to tell your truth, be who you are, rather than pretend to be a “good
date” which is no fun, always creates anxiety, and it's false advertising.
5. Your Integrity vs Being "Nice"
First and foremost, take good care of yourself when you are meeting
people and dating. Do not give up what you believe in, do not allow yourself
to “just go along” with what the other person wants in order to be nice — because, no matter how the date goes, your integrity is the most important
thing you need to go home with.
6. What Do You Really Want?
Be as clear as you can be about what you really want. Is it to be loved
and respected and enjoyed for the rest of your life? Or is it the physical
beauty of a woman or the bank book of a man? Whatever you want is up to you
-- but do not confuse material values with love.
Now you can get out there on solid ground, have a great time, and trust you're
dating with the kind of pizzazz that will eventually attract your lifelong love.
Discover more about Judith & Jim’s Smart Dating approach at


If you're fed up with dating games that leave you frustrated and confused,
check out "Smart Dating for Success Every Time - Guaranteed" -
dedicated to men and women who are ready for the best love has to offer!

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Tips for Smart Dating

By Judith and Jim
Dating can be a nightmare when you rely on old-fashioned ideas of what it means to be a “good date” - catering to the other person, worried about making a good impression, selling yourself short at every turn.
But when you follow these Tips for Smart Dating, you set yourself up to succeed on every date AND attract the right kind of person that you’re looking for and who’s looking for you.  
1. Beware of the person who comes on too fast.  Chances are he/she is “in love with love”—not you.  There is no such thing as intimacy at first sight.
2. Pay attention to your need for instant chemistry and don’t limit  yourself to falling only for “your type.”  You are probably caught up in the challenge of conquering someone who is not very available.
3. Avoid creating romantic scenarios during early dates.  Don’t play sexy music.  Stay away from darkly lit, elegant restaurants.  Wait a while before giving  flowers or gifts.  Find out more about the person to determine if you’re really interested.
4. Hold off on sex, even kissing.  If your relationship proves to be real, there will come a time when love-play actually means something.  Don’t confuse heat with heart.
5. Abandon the ritual of the man being the one to call, ask for the date, plan and pay. One of the best ways to protect against the traps of false romance is to make dating an equal opportunity event.  Share the asking, planning, paying and even driving.  Then you’re both on equal footing as competent, available adults.
6. Avoid trying to entertain or impress your family, friends and acquaintances with stories about your dates.  The drama of the story can confuse your perception of what really happened.
7. If you’ve just started dating someone, and you’re fantasizing about your future together, please stop.  That is only make-believe and will keep you off balance in reality.
8. Go on non-romantic dates—walks in the park, sports events, charity fundraisers, museums or bookstores.  The point is to get to know what your date is like in his or her real life.
9.Express your sincere feelings. If you enjoy being with someone, let them know. Then pay close attention to how your comments are received. When they are welcomed and reciprocated, then you can begin to explore what it actually means to each of you to be together. At the heart of Smart Dating, the truth really does set you free to create exactly the kind of relationship you really want.     
When you follow these nine tips for Smart Dating, you can relax and know that you are in charge of yourself and the positive outcome of every date you go on.   

If you're fed up with dating games that leave you frustrated and confused,
check out "Smart Dating for Success Every Time - Guaranteed" -
dedicated to men and women who are ready for the best love has to offer!

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Being Single Doesnt mean you are failing

By Judy and Jim

Have you felt tortured by being single - certain there’s something wrong with you?
Perhaps your family bugs you about why you’ve not yet gotten married, acting like you’re weird.

BUT the fact is there’s nothing wrong with you being single. It’s simply a quality of your current life.

And you never know when and why you’ll meet the person who will forever more change your life for the better.

For example, we feel that we were destined to be together - but Jim was not available until the time we met on a blind date over 20 years ago.
He was involved in 2 other marriages and a couple other semi-serious relationships - and there was no way to rush the process that had to unfold in order for our marriage to occur.

So please remember that there’s a larger story going on for you than you are aware of. And don’t come down on yourself - or allow anyone else to do it either!
In the meantime, we strongly suggest you check out our tested and proven program -
Smart Dating for Success Every Time - Guaranteed!

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

How to make sure she shows up for the date

Now we’ll discuss how to make sure she shows up in the first place and doesn’t "flake"

First, ask yourselves this:

* Have you ever made plans with a woman and not have her show up?

* Have you ever gotten a phone call earlier that day telling you that she "has to work" or "isn’t feeling well"?

* Have you ever made plans with a woman and then she told you to "call to confirm"

If any of that applies to you, you need to really pay attention here. This will banish flakes forever.

First, let’s review the first three phases of The Emotional Progression Model:




The biggest mistake most men make in terms of Day2s is going for the phone number as soon as she is attracted (in Attraction) and not pushing the relationship forward. Then they assume that the woman will meet them again, and they can continue where they left off. Only to get "flaked". They never meet up.

Why? Let’s look at the situation from a woman’s perspective:

She goes out to a restaurant with her friends. While waiting at the bar, an interesting man approaches her. 3-5 minutes later (about how long it should take to get some attraction going), he asks for her number so they can "hang out sometime". At that moment, she genuinely would "hang out" with this man "sometime"...

...but it doesn’t turn out that way.

See, going out "sometime" is different from going out Thursday night. To see her "sometime" all you have to do is be more interesting than doing nothing. That’s a pretty low standard, so of course she’ll agree to it. And, if she has nothing else to do, she might actually see you. However, most worthwhile women rarely have "nothing else to do".

So, to see her at a specific time, you need to be more interesting than anything else she could be doing, like friends, hobbies, work, other dates, or relaxing at home. That’s a tough standard to meet in 3-5 minutes. Especially since over the course of the night she met a bunch of other men. Did you think you were the only man to notice her? She likes all of the attention and flirting, but she doesn’t have time to go on 9 dates this week.

*A woman is going to look for reasons NOT to go out with you*

Remember, meeting up with strange men is scary for a woman. First, there are issues of physical safety. If she’s not comfortable with you, she may feel the risk of date rape or worse. Less dramatically is the hyper-developed fear that many women have of being in awkward social situations. Women do not generally go by themselves to interact socially with strangers. So they bring a friend. To a man, the idea that you might not have a great time with this woman is irrelevant. Maybe you will, maybe you won’t. Maybe you don’t care, because she’s beautiful. Either way, you’ll never know if you don’t meet up. Worst case scenario is you cut it short early and go home. Men don’t agonize and worry over whether it will be socially awkward or not. But many women do, and we need to take this into account.

It should be clear by now that a quick interaction leading to some basic attraction and "we should hang out sometime" is rarely going to lead an exceptionally desirable woman into seeing you again. She fears safety, she fears social awkwardness, and who is this guy anyway? She’s busy and she only met you for five minutes. If she’s really trying to convince herself not to show up, she’ll wonder why you’d even call her when you only met for a few minutes and you know so little about her (after all, you spent that time attracting her as opposed to learning about her). Are you desperate? Or are you a player?

To fix that mistake, make sure you get into Comfort during the first meet.

I don’t care if you only have 10 minutes. You just have to play faster. You need to qualify and get into comfort for your "time bridge" (seeing her again) to stick. If you qualify and get into comfort, you minimize ALL of the objections we just discussed.

The second biggest mistake you can make is to go for the Day2 unnecessarily

There is nothing in Emotional Progression Model that mandates meeting her again at a different time (a Day2). Sure, you may have to, like if you meet her on your lunch break and have to get back to work, but a lot of guys are used to thinking of getting a woman’s phone number as something special. It’s not. Phone numbers do not lead to happy social lives; relationships do.

A phone number is a tool. It’s not a goal. It’s not even an intermediate goal. Don’t ever feel proud of yourself for getting a phone number.

In a way, a phone number is an admission of failure, even if it’s sometimes an unavoidable failure. A phone number says "I am not trying to move this relationship forward right now. I am taking the risk that she will flake and am hoping to continue this later. In the worst case, I lose the relationship with her. In the best case, she meets me for the Day 2 and I’m more or less where I am now"

Make sense? A phone number never gains you anything. A Day 2 never gains you anything. All it does is give you another chance to push the relationship forward if the logistics weren’t right to do so when you met her.

Here’s an example from the bootcamp in LA last weekend. We took the guys to a lounge in Hollywood and one of them was deep in conversation with Suzanne, a very fit Asian woman. Suzanne’s friends were happy for her to talk to our guy, because he had already won them over in A2 (as per the Mystery Method). It was about midnight. There was no time pressure. But when our student "ran out of things to say" he took her phone number and rejoined us.

This was a bad decision. All the phone number was going to do was help them meet up again to spend time together. However, they were already in the middle of spending time together. Psychologically, he wanted to "lock in" what he had "gained" so far: her willingness to give him her phone number. That’s a rookie mistake.

Of course, we didn’t let him leave Suzanne. We led him back to her with instructions to escalate until rejection. When the lights came on an hour later, they left to get pizza. And then to go home together. There was no need for a time bridge.

He made dozens of mistakes in picking up Suzanne. We were watching him the whole time and went over them the next day. However, because he had the guts to go for it, and because he did enough things right that he’d learned that day in our seminar, he got the girl.

Ready for the good news and the bad news?

The good news is that now that you know this, you’ll never make these two mistakes again.

The bad news is that you’ll still need Day 2s, and you’ll still get some flakes. To banish flakes entirely, you need to use these ADVANCED tactics:

* Have something specific to do. She should plan to help you shop for your niece’s birthday on Saturday, not "hang out sometime"

* Bait her into suggesting the Day 2. Let her chase you. Drop little hints ("I’m going to X" or "I’d love to do Y") and see if she tries to become part of those plans.

* Don’t make the day2 (or the phone number exchange) the last part of your interaction. That *feels* like a pickup. Stay at least 5 minutes afterwards.

* Engage her friends. When she goes home her friends should be excited for her that you guys are meeting up later and not wondering who that creepy guy was. To a woman, her friends’ approval for the men she dates is very important. Much more important than peer group approval is for men.

* Focus on the Day2, not the phone number. The phone should be an afterthought (and isn’t always necessary, although you take a big risk by not getting it). If she’s all excited to come see you at a book reading you’re going to be at the next night, you don’t need her phone number. If she likes you, she’ll come.

* Set up callback humor. If you have a running joke during your interaction where you have a nickname for her, and later you phone her and call her by that nickname, it often triggers a reversal to the previous emotional state. She’ll be back in the world of being out, having fun, and meeting men, as opposed to whatever mundane thing she was actually doing when you called.

* If she’s drinking, address it. Tease her that she won’t remember anything because she’s drunk. Pretend that you guys would have so much fun together, but she had to ruin it by being drunk and making it so it would be weird when you call. Bait her into convincing you that she’s not all that drunk, that she’s really into you, and she can’t wait to hear from you. After she’s said that, it becomes a lot harder for her to be flaky. Warning, don’t do this unless the girl actually IS really drunk. It will annoy her if she’s just had a drink or two.

While you’re learning all of this stuff, you’ll still get flakes. Here’s what to do when she calls to tell you "I have to work tonight"

* Don’t be upset. Don’t lecture her. She doesn’t care. All you’ll succeed in doing is making her momentarily feel badly. She’ll feel better once the next guy gives her attention, and she’ll associate negative feelings with you. Remember, she’s canceling because she’s not that into you yet. [99% of the time, this is the case. Would she be canceling if it were Brad Pitt?]. Making her feel badly is only going to make her less into you.

* Just in case that wasn’t clear. You planned to meet a girl at 6? You had to leave work early? Fight traffic? Cut your workout short? Miss your favorite show? Tough. She doesn’t care. That’s not her problem. If you tell her all of this, you just look like even more of a tool because you rearranged your life for a date with her.

* Act like a guy who has lots of women interested in him and pursuing him. If that was you, and a girl flaked, your reaction would be "OK cool" because you have lots of other girls who would love to see you and more than likely whatever it was you were going to do was something you were going to be doing anyway with cool friends. If you don’t think you have that attitude down properly, try canceling the next time you set up a first date with a random girl. Listen for her casual reaction. It didn’t ruin her day. It shouldn’t ruin yours.

* A phrase I’ve had a lot of success with (credit Savoy) is "No problem, I’ll invite someone else". Obviously don’t use this on a third or fourth date, but when it’s still casual, it’s perfect.

Flaking sucks. I want you guys to banish it forever. Your social life will improve dramatically. For even more tips and tricks for making your life easier with women, check out the Magic Bullets ebook.

How to get a girl and how to keep her

How do You Get a Great Girl... and How Do You Keep Her?

by Savoy, President and CEO of "The Mystery Method"

Guys don’t talk about this stuff. Sure maybe once in a while your best friend might tell you that you’re being too nice or your clothes are out of style, but we are not bombarded with information and advice on how to succeed with women. That’s normal. In general, men are valued, and value themselves, on their accomplishments.

It’s different for women. In general, women are valued, or value themselves, on their relationships. You probably know this, but the implications are important.

Have you ever heard women talking in great detail about their hair? Where they get it cut, how they get it cut, what shampoo, what conditioner, what highlights, it goes on and on. Not just about hair either, but about clothes, makeup, shoes, skin care, etc. For most of my life, I thought this meant women were unusually vain, superficial, and obsessed with minutia.

Now look at it from a woman’s perspective. That stuff is pretty darn important. Even in today’s world, women are judged, especially by other women, on how they look and what kind of man they have. After a certain age, ranging from early 20s in small conservative towns to about 30 in some big cities, a single woman around her married or committed friends is an object of pity, even if they pretend to envy her to make her feel better. So women’s magazines focus on this: how to look good, how to find a man, how to get a man, how to keep a man. This doesn’t mean I endorse that view or see women that way, but as we often tell men on our weekend workshops - we didn’t make the world; we just live in it.

So let’s talk about this world – the real world - as it pertains to dating

Most people get their subconscious mental map of how dating works from movies and TV shows. These do not accurately portray reality. The audience wants the shy and lovable man to get the girl. In real life he goes home alone, while she goes to a party with the challenging man who has an edge to him. Most women do not know, or do not want to admit to themselves, what really attracts them, so their advice is not always helpful There are no magic bullets – no “pickup lines” or pheromones or other shortcuts. If you don’t intuitively understand the psychology behind dating, you either learn it or you hope for luck.

Men rarely want to admit that are not completely successful with women. If a man approaches a woman at a bar and gets rejected, he comes back to his friends and says she was ugly up close or a bitch or any other excuse. This helps him not feel rejected, especially in front of his friends. However, the best thing he could have done would have been to divorce his ego from the process and then figure out why the rejection occurred. The ego issue is crucial – she wasn’t rejecting him, she was rejecting his approach. How could she possibly be rejecting him when she only talked to him for 30 seconds? He just needs to get better at those 30 seconds, then the next 30 seconds, then the 30 seconds after that, and so on. Then he can invest emotional energy in her.

Well guess what? Starting with a few brave souls, there is a community of men who have been learning from each other what works and what doesn’t in the real world. A recent bestselling book, The Game, by Neil Strauss documented how he, as a shy and balding 30something man (5’6, 120lbs) became recognized as the world’s #1 Pickup Artist after working with the top experts in the field from The Mystery Method, the premier dating coaching resource for men worldwide. It’s a trend. Your friends, your neighbors, your competition are all among the estimated 3 million men worldwide who have learned from one of these real world dating/seduction schools. It’s like better shampoo for women, except it has a far more dramatic impact, and still not everyone knows about it.

Try these tips next time you go out!

I certainly don’t have time to go into all of the precepts of The Mystery Method here, but there are basic pointers that I can give that are pretty universal and will improve your success just by themselves. This is just the tip of the iceberg, but it’s a start:

Approach a woman within 3 seconds of seeing her. Don’t stall. You’ll get more nervous and she’ll see you working up your courage. Just go in.

Start with an opinion opener. “Hey, settle this drama for us. My friend over there wants to date his cousin’s ex-girlfriend. Is that cool? How long should he have to wait?” is perfectly fine as an opener. Within 1-2 minutes, switch to another topic. Ask for the opinion as if it’s a real situation; otherwise they’ll think you’re taking a survey.

If she’s with friends, engage her group. Don’t pay special attention to her. Make her earn your attention.

Your body language is crucial. Nearly every guy at our workshops starts off doing most of the following: leaning in to talk to women (stand up straight, always); talking too softly; not smiling; or talking too fast.

Build attraction before building comfort. Don’t prove to her that you’re nice. Prove to her that you have value. Tell her stories that just happen to convey good things about yourself. Make her laugh. Tease her a bit, like she’s your bratty little sister. Many women love that if done in moderation. Once you have mutual attraction, then and only then build comfort by looking for common interests and finding out about each other.

For most women it takes approximately 7 hours from meeting her the first time to having sex with her. Don’t obey this schedule like a slave, but realize that going faster may risk freaking her out (or not seeing her a second time) and taking too long might put you in the Let’s Just Be Friends zone.

Want to learn more?

Check out the guide that pickup artists turn to - Magic Bullets. 202-pages of step-by-step instructions, examples and stories for attracting beautiful women.

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Why bad kissers don't get to second base

Does he love me?, I wanna know!
How can I tell if he loves me so?
(Is it in his eyes?), Oh no! You need to see!
(Is it in his eyes?), Oh no! You make believe!
If you wanna know, If he loves you so
Its in his kiss! (That's where it is!)

So just how important is the kiss? As the lyrics to the song (Cher) say, it's all about the kiss. The article below came out yesterday and confirms that scientific research indicates that if you are bad kisser, you are SOL. Have any interesting stories to tell on this topic? Do you agree or disagree with the article? Lets hear your opinion. You can submit them anonymously here. I have two personal stories to start off.

My first kiss (and the reason I do not smoke). I was 17 years old (yeah, I know, a late bloomer) and had my first kiss in the Taco Bell Lobby in Franklin Square. On the one hand it was kind of cool because I had never kissed before, but overall the experience left me nauseous because the girl tasted like an ashtray. Almost twenty years later, that kiss is still the reason I never got into smoking and will not date a smoker (unless she is trying to quit). Thanks Sue, if your out there!

The Biter. At first I thought maybe she was just kinky and into some type of pain fetish, but then it happened again. Lisa had no idea how to kiss and I think I left with a bloody lip. Needless to say, I never saw her again.
By Jocelyn Voo- CNN Living

(LifeWire) -- Bad kissers -- we've all locked lips with one: the lizard, the washing machine, the cannibal, the spelunker.

"I knew this girl that I'll call Big Tongue," recalls Craig Hinkle, 38, a Westminster, California-based network administrator. "Her tongue was massive, and she insisted on trying to put the entire thing in my mouth. She was very forceful with it, and I started choking."
You can guess that relationship didn't last. And now, what Hinkle knows from experience is actually backed up by science: Bad kissers have little chance of getting to second base.

In a study published recently in the scientific journal "Evolutionary Psychology," 59 percent of men and 66 percent of women said they've been in the position of being attracted to someone -- until they kissed the person.

"At the moment of the kiss, there's a very complicated exchange of information ... that may tap into underlying evolved mechanisms" cluing us in on whether we're genetically compatible, explains Gordon Gallup, co-author of the study and professor of psychology at the State University of New York at Albany. "A kiss can be a deal-breaker in terms of whether a relationship will flower or flounder, so to speak."
Rachel Myeroff, 26, can attest to that. On a second date with a guy, says the New York City-based sales manager, "he just went in for it and attached himself to me in the sloppiest, most horrible kiss ever. He was just consuming my mouth. I most definitely did not call him again."

Why we kiss

Gallup's research suggests that men and women have different agendas when it comes to kissing, an act that occurs in 95 percent of human societies and is believed to have been first recorded in Vedic Sanskrit texts around 1500 B.C. in India.
For men, kissing is more often used as a means to an end -- namely, to gain sexual access. Men also are more likely to literally kiss and make up, using kissing to attempt reconciliation.

Women on the other hand use kissing as a mate-assessment technique, Gallup notes. They subconsciously evaluate mating potential from the chemicals in their partner's saliva and breath, for instance. Women also use kissing as a bonding gesture, as well as to monitor the status of the relationship. If her partner's kissing frequency or technique suddenly changes, that perhaps is a sign of his waning interest.

Other gender differences uncovered by Gallup's research:
• Men show a greater preference for tongue contact and open-mouth kisses.
• Men are more willing than women to have sex with someone without kissing, as well as to have sex with someone they are not attracted to or consider to be a bad kisser.
• Women place more importance on kissing throughout a relationship, whereas men place less importance on it as the relationship progresses.
Improve your kiss

If you've ever been told to kiss off after smooching someone beneath the holiday mistletoe, fear not. Like other skills, one's kissing technique can be improved upon. Michael Christian, author of "The Art of Kissing" (under the pen name William Cane), offers classes, and there's a myriad of how-to books and DVDs.
To improve your technique, Christian suggests switching up your repertoire with different types of kisses:

• Vacuum kiss, in which you suck the air out of your partner's mouth while kissing
• Neck kiss, in which you kiss up and down your partner's neck
• "Lip-o-suction," in which you kiss the upper lip while your partner kisses the lower lip, and then you reverse.

Bad kisses, on the other hand, are relatively easy to pinpoint. "Bad kisses trigger the gag reflex," Christian says. "Bad kisses are also static and repetitious. Varying the speed, intensity and style can help."

Spontaneity also can help you get out of a slump.
"The best kisses are always the ones that happen accidentally," observes New York City resident Benjamin Kayne, 25, a digital media sales director. "(Planned kisses) are just tedious, and I'm sitting there thinking, 'Is this over yet? The commercial is over and I'm missing "CSI".'
Have any interesting stories to tell on this topic? Do you agree or disagree with the article? Lets hear your opinion. You can submit them anonymously here.

Friday, November 30, 2007

December 07 Singles Horoscopes

Your Romance and Partnership Horoscopes for December 2007 And Your Keys For The New Year

by Vanessa Calderon

To read Vanessa's article about Astrology readings, visit Astrology and Relationships

(March 21 – April 19)

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)
Hey Aries, Venus is in Scorpio for the duration of December. Usually Aries and Scorpio are touted as being a combustible combination, a combination of signs that rarely get along. Not true. You and Scorpio have a silent understanding. You both possess an inner passion that surpasses that of any of the other signs. The goddess of love is going to heighten your senses – all of them – especially during the first week of the month. From the middle to the end of the month, a combination of Mars, Jupiter and Pluto will activate both the areas of your life where you hide away from the world, and the sector of your public persona. By the end of the month, you’ll be in demand with the public, and you will also be one hot tomale inside where it is warm and toasty. No combination could be better for bringing in the New Year. If this combination of planets takes on a serious tone for you, it will be involving potential conflicts between your image at work/in the outside world, and your life and personality at home. It could become intense, so do some deep breathing and balance things wisely.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: This time last year, your financial situation may have been something totally different than what it has become. On January 1st, your New Year’s outlook reveals the need to tie up loose purse strings and make a new financial strategy. In love, you should open yourself up to new experiences altogether, or at the very least, take an entirely new and different approach regarding a current or past romantic partner.
The key is to retreat and take care of yourself first, and you’ll attract a whole new type of love.

 (April 20-May 20)

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)
Take another good look out into that crowd. Do you see someone you want to get to know? You should. Your mirror/partnership house holds the Goddess of love for the entire month of December. Mars is tricky though, so you may miss something the first time. This also goes for communications between you and your inner circle. Take time to hear what they are really saying to you. Staying close to home when you go out to socialize may seem very tempting, as you are also feeling the effects of a backward Mars in your zone of movement. Do not stay too close to home out of shyness, however, because it would be a shame to waste that Venus energy.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: A new opportunity to study and experience something foreign, and possibly something that is a little taboo, makes its way into your world in 2008 (if it already hasn’t!). You might even feel a pull toward changing your personal philosophies on subjects pertaining to religion, sex, and money. There is nothing wrong with learning. In fact you will do a lot of learning about these subjects in 2008, either through experiences or books. The key is open-mindedness. Open yourself up to exploration and flex your intellect.

 (May 21 – June-21)

GEMINI (May21-June21)
You are going to love giving this month, Gemini – that’s right, giving – and you have the power to heal someone in some way, by your kindness and generosity. Every extra effort you make this month will be noticed and appreciated, especially by someone who is having a hard time. You might not even know what a difference you have made in his or her life just by being thoughtful. Rest assured: It will be returned. Mars will see to that. Pass some of your extraordinary energy around. You have a chance from the middle of the month on to meet someone whose chemistry is so interlocked with yours that you could be walking into walls (so to speak) by year’s end. So it is no surprise to hear what your key in 2008 will be…
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Partnerships that are deep and long lasting. You have ample opportunity in 2008 to cement ties with people that will last a lifetime. The energy started to appear in November, actually, and remains a signature for you. The key is self-reflection. Deal with every person you meet as if they are here to reflect your own strengths back to you. You will be meeting people who are your mirror image in some way, all year long.

(June 22 – July 23)
CANCER (June 22-July 23)
Progress has been made lately in some areas of your life, but you may feel as if some of that progress is being undone. If you or your partners are reverting back to old habits and old ways, don’t take it to heart. You have Venus moving into your sector of romance and creativity this month, so she should be able to help direct some loving energy in the right direction. Trust that setbacks in your relationships with yourself and others are only temporary and above all do not be hard on yourself! You have been entrusted with the often impossible task of caring for people, more so than any other sign in the zodiac. You are really to be commended for all of your efforts in 2007.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Second chances. Your partnership point in your New Year’s chart has been inundated with heavy energy from Pluto and Jupiter. They are dancing over your self-esteem in the area of relationships with all kinds of people. And guess what? They are whipping up a plan for improvements in that area of your life. Stay positive, accept the sweeping changes that occur involving the people in your life, and experience that there are really such things as second chances.

 (July 23 – August 22)

LEO (July 23- Aug 22)
Write down your dreams this month, Leo, because they will bring you some very true (and maybe some startling) pieces of information regarding what you want out of lovers, why you want what you want from them, and what purpose these people are actually serving in your life. Actually, you might want to start and dream journal and continue to use it since lots of creative ideas will be pulsing around your brain. You wouldn’t want to miss out on what you can achieve by listening to your own inner voice. The very last week of the month is all about your heart growing fonder, and you may not have to look much farther than right in front of you to know who the most special person in your life is.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: People who pull you in new directions. You will be moving away from old patterns in relationships. Any areas of false dependency will be replaced by a new sense of independence and a true sense of balanced give and take. This should be your mantra for the New Year: “I completely and only take on loving, creative and fair relationships wherein both parties are treated justly.” I know how Leos are, and I am warning you: don’t fight the forward movement. Go with the flow – stubbornness is futile in the hands of the planet Pluto! And since I also know how that the fabled “Leo vanity problem” is mostly just a fa├žade, the key is going to be that you use some of that selfless love you have inside of you on yourself, not just on others. Happy New Year.

(August 23 – Sept 22)

VIRGO (Aug 23- Sept 22)
The month of December is best spent participating in group events right in your own neighborhood, Virgo. That is where you will find a beautiful Venus – Mars combination in water signs lighting up your horoscope. Virgos appreciate beauty in the same way that Scorpios do, on a sensual level. Cancereans and Virgos are capable of feeling under toe of emotion that pulls them to want to serve and help other people. Both of those energies are heightened this month for you. And then, be sure that you mean what you say and say what you mean in the second half of the month when communications between you and your romantic interests (and in any situation that concerns children, as well), have the power to become cemented in stone. In other words, you can’t take it back.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Surprises in relationships. This theme started last month and is going to continue through 2008. Finding out things you never knew or suspected about your partners is bound to happen. You have the dubious distinction of having Saturn in your sign. Fortunately, this planet is lucky for you in the romance sector IF you are able to let go and let Uranus shake up your world. Your key is to accept change as the natural path to perfection, be honest with yourself about what perfection is, and don’t hold onto the imperfect out of fear.

(Sept 23 - October 23)

LIBRA (Sept 23- Oct 23)
Luck comes at you through professional and work partners this month, Libra. These people see you shine. It is ok to let your feelings be known to the outside world for the first half of this month because your emotions will be worn on your sleeve. Your secrets are safe with the ones you love. If you are looking for a mentor, or even just a new and exciting person that you can learn from, look to someone who knows how to make money from home. Keep your sense of humor at the end of the month when communications between you and your parents, or you and the person you share children with, are highlighted. Perceived conflicts are resolved quickly.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Flexibility is the theme for next year. You need to remain open minded in general, and be open to new ideas concerning relationships. The people who you thought you would likely be attracted to are not necessarily the types you will be looking at in the coming year, even though you will feel nostalgia for the way things used to be. It is all about moving forward without giving up everything you treasure from the past. The transition from the old you to the new you should be quite effortless, and enjoyable. Your key is to remember that when you evolve to the next level, you take everything you have learned with you.

(October 24 – Nov 21)

SCORPIO (Oct 24- Nov 21)
Venus, the goddess of love, will be in your sign all month and will make a fluid angle to planets which cause you to have, “lightning bolt” moments of intuition even more precise the ones you normally have. Quick decision-making is your forte this month in matters of the heart and you will surprise yourself with the philosophical wisdom you possess. The insights that you gain about your usual approach to love and partnerships may change the course of your search for fulfillment in relationships in general. Toward the end of the month, you will reevaluate all of the new ideas you are mulling over, and you will find at least one that you will become permanent. The middle of the month is a good time to plan a trip to a place you have never visited before.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Equally intense feelings in more than one direction, or for more than one person. You are going to be able to focus your attention and affections on more than one person, place or thing at a time in 2008. You, more than any other sign, have both the fluidity and the dedication to make a parallel existence work. You can move like a Gemini when you want to, and you have the staying power of a Taurus as well. The keys are honesty and good judgment. Don’t take on more than you can handle, and be sure to use this power to do good in your world.

(Nov 22 – Dec 21)

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22- Dec 21)
It is a little crowded in your sign for most of December. If your decision-making ability seems to have taken a hiatus and confusion reigns, (especially when it comes to money, and your sex life), then try to ride it out until the end of the month. The intensity level does not drop but some of your choices become more concrete.  There is a very strong burst of energy in your sign this month that may or may not be all flowers and joy, depending on your circumstances. It would be wise to refrain from making any rash decisions or assumptions until after the 25th, especially where your closest allies and your partners are concerned. Many communications will be brutally honest and lots can get lost in translation. If people seem to be hiding something from you it is better off that you wait till the smoke and mirrors clear before you make accusations, or get upset. On a more positive note, your creativity and your power to make your mark on the world will be at its peak this month. Make the most of the opportunities for personal growth that will come your way.
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: A welcome release. If you feel that you have been tumbling in a washing machine over the past few years, (or longer), then get ready for a flick of the off switch in 2008. Or at least you’ll be reset on a more gentle cycle. The past several years have not been light and airy for Sagittarians (nor for people with Sagittarius rising or for people with major planets in your sign. In other words, Pluto has had his way with many people who have both strong and subtle Sagittarian connections in their birth charts). Pluto is slowly creeping out of your sign. Perhaps in 2008, you’ll be able to take that long, cleansing breath you have been longing for. Besides, you begin 2008 with Venus entering your sign. For you, there is no better place for the goddess of love to be.

(Dec 22 – January 19 )

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22- Jan 19)
Going over and over current romantic dilemmas is not going to make you any calmer or relaxed, but it certainly might bring up some long-repressed memories and issues that have kept you from moving forward with your love life. Venus moves into a place where you can certainly use the action. It is a fun place where you will have opportunities to meet attractive people within groups and in social environments. However, don’t let lingering questions about someone’s loyalty hold you back. Believe it or not you already have enough information and enough to go on in order to make your leap to the next level in your life. And what a leap it is going to be!
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Let go of your fears and have faith that you will make the right decisions. You are the next place where Pluto is going to set up shop and his sojourn in your sign begins in 2008. For humanity, he will crash down the walls of limiting beliefs that we have all built up around us. For you personally he will do the same thing, but he will also give you tremendous courage with each brave step forward. Capricorns have some of the most penetrating minds in the zodiac. So much so, that you drive yourselves crazy thinking all the time. Just learn to let that all go. Seek a calmer set of relationships with people who have earned how to transcend melodrama. They will be able to help you handle anything you choose to do battle with over the next several years. If you remain totally honest with yourself at all times, the people with whom you bond yourself to over the next several years will be with you indefinitely.

 (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

AQUARIUS (Jan 20- Feb 20)
Prepare to meet a person you can work with, and have a romantic connection with, Aquarius. It is Venus on your destiny point which will not only manifest for you, but will also make you oh-so-delectable to the public this month. Get out and flaunt it. Your personal magnetism and the intense sensual energy that you are giving off will peak around the third week of the month. Don’t get too many stars in your eyes and you won’t walk into any walls. You’ll likely have some very romantic and, um, sexy dreams in December (both while awake and asleep).
YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Friends who make you feel good. You are advised to take advantage of the people who are about to walk into your life in 2008. You begin the year with Mars briefly revisiting your romantic place, and with Venus entering the place where your friends reside. These are two wonderful places where connections are made between you and like-minded people. Don’t settle for anything less than bonding with people who share your unique visions. Mercury and Neptune are lining up to give you plenty of those unique visions this coming year, and it will take these special people to help you sort everything out.

 (Feb 19 – March 20)

PISCES (Feb 21- March 20)
Looking for a career change? Then this is the month to go for it. Looking for a change in your romantic life? Then wait till January. You’re likely to remain right where you are relationship wise this month, but that will definitely be to your advantage as important issues get hashed out among partners who have their own sordid business to attend to. Have you ever met someone who you thought was nice, (because you think everyone is nice, anyways), and come to find out they weren’t all you thought they were? You might run into a few of those this month. Don’t fret, just enjoy the eggnog and let them reap their karma. And don’t you dare try to save them. It is really fun to watch someone walk into a tree sometimes, honest! (You always come out smelling like the sweetest rose in the bunch anyhow).

YOUR KEYS FOR 2008: Really putting what you have learned over the last few years to use. It is likely that you have had a little bit of an education in using your mind to sort out the impressions that your feeling nature is in charge of soaking in (in other words, you may have had some practice in using common sense to judge the world around you instead of always kindly getting kicked around). Now you are ready for the next step and will get the opportunity to share your knowledge with others. Peers who have had issues with emotional turmoil will seek out your advice. Career develops new meaning to you and you will attract a lot of positive attention when you go out and allow the world to hear how intelligent and funny you are.

Saturday, November 24, 2007

Truths Women should know

Based on the program from Jim and Judy

Dating isn’t a breeze. A vicious tornado is more like it. So, here’s some wisdom from top-notch experts. A few love truths every woman must know.

Truth #1:If he doesn’t call you in a week, he’s not interested. According to Dr. Judith Sherven, a clinical psychologist in New York, when a guy lets a week pass before contacting you, it’s his way of forcing “casualness” in the relationship. It’s an unspoken signal that he doesn’t want to pursue you seriously – either because the timing was off or he just didn’t click with you.

Truth #2:By date three, you might reject him. That’s the word from Dr. James Sneechowski, co-author of the book “Be Loved For Who You Really Are”. He says at this point, you start noticing flaws, but getting nitpicky is a sign you’re considering this guy as a possible partner. You start kicking the tires like you would a car because it’s a huge investment. So don’t run the other way when he starts falling from grace. Understand that this is totally normal, and get to know him well before you make any big decisions.

Truth #3:Don’t get stuck thinking that you only have ONE soul mate. According to Dr. Sneechowski, defining what you want EXACTLY in a partner is impractical. It keeps you from getting serious with different guys because you’re holding out for THE ONE. The doctor says soul mates aren’t hatched. They grow. You make a connection, build a relationship and then realize this is the person with whom you were meant to be.
So throw away that list of requirements and give the not-so-perfect guys a chance.

Get the program from Jim and Judy

Men vs. Women-Funny Part 2

Men vs. Women


Women: A woman makes a list of things she needs, then goes out to the store and buys those things.

Men: A man waits till the only items left in his fridge are half a lime and a beer. Then he goes grocery shopping. He buys everything that looks good. By the time a man reaches the checkout counter, his cart is packed tighter than the Clampett's car on Beverly Hillbillies. Of course, this will not stop him from going to the express lane.


Women: They mature much faster than men. Most 17-year old females can function as adults.

Men: Most 17-year old males are still trading baseball cards and giving each other wedgies after gym class. This is why high school romances rarely work out.


Women: When preparing for work, a woman will put on a wool suit, then slip on Reebok sneakers. She will carry her dress shoes in a plastic bag from Saks. When a woman gets to work, she will put on her dress shoes. Five minutes later, she will kick them off because her feet are under the desk.

Men: A man will wear the same pair of shoes all day. Let's not talk about how many days he'll wear the same socks.


Women: A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams.

Men: A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house.


Women: Women do laundry every couple of days.

Men: A man will wear every article of clothing he owns, including his surgical pants (the ones that were hip about eight years ago) before he will do his laundry. When he is finally out of clothes, he will wear a dirty sweatshirt inside out, rent a U-Haul and take his mountain of clothes to the Laundromat. Men always expect to meet beautiful women at the Laundromat. This is a myth perpetuated by reruns of old episodes of "Love American Style."


Men: Men are vain and will check themselves out in a mirror.

Women: They are ridiculous; they will check out their reflections in any shiny surface: mirrors, spoons, store windows, bald guys' heads.

Richard Gere:

Women: Women like Richard Gere because he is sexy in a dangerous way.

Men: Men hate Richard Gere because he reminds them of that slick guy who works at the health club and dates only married women.

Locker Rooms:

Men: In the locker room men talk about three things: money, football, and women. They exaggerate about money, they don't know football nearly as well as they think they do, and they fabricate stories about women.

Women: They talk about one thing in the locker room - sex. And not in abstract terms, either. They are extremely graphic and technical, and they never lie.


Women: Women on a girls' night out talk the whole time.

Men: Men on a boy's night out say about twenty words all night, most of which are "Pass the Doritos" or "got any more beer?"

Online dating- 5 things to avoid

Posted Oct 10th 2007 1:30PM by Joshua Fruhlinger
This article came from AOL

Everyone's doing it - over 40 percent of U.S. singles are finding matches online. That's more than 40 million single Americans cruising the Internet looking for love (based on census results that say there are over 100 million single Americans).

So the Internet must be a great place to find true love, right? Not so fast. While online dating can be a great way to find someone new, dating sites are littered with scam artists, cheaters, and straight-up liars.

Now, this doesn't mean you should avoid online dating altogether -- just don't believe everything you see out there. In order to help sort out the winners from the losers, we've compiled a list of the top five types of online daters you should definitely avoid, along with some tips to help you save some heartache. Be careful out there, and good luck!

1. Liars
In a recent survey, it was found that most online profiles contain some sort of lie, whether it's the person's age or -- in some cases -- relationship status. White lies -- adding an inch to height or dropping a couple pounds -- are the most common and not a big deal to most people.

Consider these facts according to the April 2007 issue of Proceedings of Computer/Human Interaction:

About 52.6 percent of men lie about their height, as do 39 percent of women.
Slightly more women lie about their weight (64.1 percent) than men (60.5 percent).
When it comes to age, 24.3 percent men lie compared with 13.1 percent of women.
When it comes to misrepresenations of age or relationship status, be careful or you could get seriously burned. In one recent case, a woman met a man on a popular dating site with whom she immediately hit it off. She even put her life on hold to go with him to Dubai when he was transferred for work. Eleven months into the relationship, she came across an e-mail -- from his son! What's more, the e-mail said something about "Mom" saying hi. In one fell swoop, our poor girl found out the man she met online was not only a father -- he was married! She moved back to the United States and has given up on online dating since.

How to Avoid Them:

Ask questions. Though it may be listed on someone's profile, someone's age is fair game in the questions department, so feel free to ask your potential date how old (or young!) they are. You may find that 35 suddenly becomes 42. While you don't want to ask too many questions and scare the person away, it's perfectly fair to verify the big things: age, weight, height, and -- most of all -- whether or not that person is, in fact, single. Half the time, people lie on their profiles to get people interested -- nine times out of ten, someone will level with you about their stats once you show some real interest, since they know they might have a chance of meeting you in person.

2. Photo Fakes

Dating site traffic analyses show that profiles with pictures are clicked on twice as much as those without. Having a good picture of yourself can be the difference between getting seen and getting lost. However, some people take the notion of "looking good" a little too far. They post misleading pictures that can trap you into thinking you're meeting your dreamboat only to find a shipwreck waiting for you. Let's face it, not everyone looks as good as George Clooney or Angelina Jolie.

Joan, a woman from New Jersey, had thought she met Mr. Right. He was charming and -- according to the picture on his profile -- quite handsome. She looked forward to seeing his auburn hair and deep eyes when it turned out that Mr. Right had gone gray. He also hadn't seen a gym in years. Turns out that his profile picture was over five years old. While there's nothing wrong with gray hair or a couple extra pounds, people who misrepresent their looks aren't being honest.

How to avoid them:

Look for profiles with more than one picture. People who choose only flattering angles could be hiding something. Ask for a recent picture, and if the person refuses, you could be looking at that person's high school yearbook photo. And if someone looks as good as George Clooney or Angelina Jolie, you need to double-check that it's for real.

3. Fixer-Uppers

Most marriages end in divorce -- that's just a fact of life. But many people on the rebound make their profiles all about what they don't want. The truth is, these people are on the rebound and are likely to still be living with the wounds of their last relationship. You may be in for some serious scrutiny, criticism, and baggage-handling, so beware. Imagine, for example, what any of Sir Paul McCartney's new lovers must think as he talks about his past relationships!

Consider these recent profile headlines:

• Cheaters Need Not Apply
• Tired of Meeting Women in Bars
• No Manipulative B*thces, please!
• Please Don't Be A Liar
• Felons, potheads and jerks need not apply

What we have here are jilted lovers. Run. Run away. While it's a good idea to learn from your past relationships, no one wants to date a bitter, angry person. By telling people what you don't want, you're scaring off potential mates.

On the other side, if you're reading profiles, avoid these singles as they are either recently out of relationships or still getting over something pretty big. They're not ready, and you don't want to be their fixer-upper.

How to avoid them:

To steer clear of the fixer-upper at all costs, watch out for the aforementioned profile headlines. While you may hate the same things these rebounders do, you still shouldn't pursue a relationship with them. Having something in common can be great, but those things should be positive, not negative. As the old saying goes,"You must love yourself before you love another...."

4. Membership Fishers

You finally got a response to your profile, and she's hot! You're all set to respond to the beauty queen, but there's one problem: Her profile happens to be over at some other site.

Of course, before you can send her a note on her profile, you're asked by the new dating site she's listed with the to sign up. Before you know it, you're a member of a new dating site, and it has your credit card info, and, it turns out, your new love doesn't exist.

Dating sites make their money on membership dues, and with thousands of them competing for daters, they're in a vicious fight to get you to sign up. Some wily sites have taken to trolling single people from other sites, making them think that a new lovely wants to meet them... at a new site that requires signing up.

How to avoid them:

Make sure anyone you hear from is already signed up with the online dating site you're signed up with. If someone responds to your profile, it means they already have a profile at the site you are using. Don't fall for the "meet me over here" tactic. If they really like you, they'll come talk to you where you are.

5. Cheaters

How is it possible that this new, wonderful person is still single? In fact, he or she may not be. While there are some great singles out there waiting to steal your heart away, some of them are not, in fact, single. Surprise, surprise, it turns out that some people use dating sites as a way to get a little something on the side when they're out of town.

Consider this story about Jill, a 27-year-old Washington, DC, marketing executive, who met the "man of her dreams" online:

"Since he lived in a different city ‑- Roanoke, Virginia ‑- it was easy for him to sneak around." She told iVillage, "Although he made excuse after excuse about why he continually had to cancel a date at the last minute ‑- one time claiming he'd been in a car accident ‑- I got suspicious only after I knew everything." There had been numerous red flags. For instance, he only called from his cell phone while driving in his car. It turns out that Joe (not his real name) was talking to several women online. According to his wife, Jill was the only one he'd actually met and kissed.

How to avoid them:

Look out for people who can only talk to you during the day, will only talk online or via text message, or who mysteriously disappear at night and on weekends. Other warning signs include out-of-town lovers who happen to be in town a lot. And be especially cautious of people who live thousands of miles away, since you have no real way of verifying what's actually going on with them day-to-day. There's a good chance you could be on the back burner. Also, look out for people who list their status as "separated" -- they could be separated in mind, only.

How to Communicate with a Man

Here are some proven ways to get your point across – and get what you want. These tips come from Oprah’s “O” magazine.

The best way to tell a man you’re interested – without sounding desperate – is to use the word “maybe.” In other words, “Maybe we should get together,” or “Maybe we should get a cup of coffee.” Why? There’s enough “yes” in “maybe” to keep a man from feeling rejected and enough “no” to keep him challenged. Think of it as a dance. Give him an opening – and then let him take the lead. W. Bruce Cameron, author of How to Remodel a Man, says whether it’s a first date or your 30th anniversary, a man likes to think every move is his idea! I know it may sound old-fashioned or sexist, but that’s what his research found to be true.

When you’re having an argument, know this: No matter what you’re arguing about, guys want to be right. Cameron says it’s a weakness you can use against men and saying “You’re right” is the verbal equivalent of tranquilizing a rampaging elephant. It gives him what he wants, reduces tension, and paves the way for you to get what you want. For example, say you want to go to a party, but your boyfriend wants to skip it because he doesn’t know anybody, and hates feeling like an outsider.Try saying: “You’re right, but I still want to go to the party with you.” It’s a win-win situation. He gets to hear he’s right but you still get your point across about the party.

When you need something done, don’t make it an order. For example, if your shower won’t stop dripping, don’t say, “Fix the drip in the shower already!” – that’s an order. Instead, let him be in charge of solving the problem. Try saying: “The leak in the shower’s driving me crazy. What should we do?” His response will probably be, “I’ll take a look after dinner.” Bottom line: Men love to be in charge and show off their skills – but they don’t like being told what to do. If you’d like to go further, the book is: How to Remodel a Man by W. Bruce Cameron.

Older Women, Younger Men

Over the past few newsletters, we have revisited the issue of having an event for Older Women and Younger Men (Men 25-35 and Women 35-45) and the flip side of an event for Older Men and Younger Women (Men 35-45 and Women 25-35). The results are in:

A) Older Women, Younger Men: About 7 or 8 men and several women responded that they would be interested in an event for Women ages 35-45 and Men 25-35. The results warrant further research into such an event.

B) Older Men, Younger Women: About 57 men and 0 Women responded that they would be interested in an event for Women ages 25-35 and Men 35-45. Based on these results, this event will not take place.

Bottom Line: Although more men seem to be open to the idea of dating an older woman, the vast majority still want to date younger women.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------The following article was in the NY Post last Week


October 23, 2007 -- SOME call them sugar daddies. (Others just call them dirty old men.)

But scientists say older men who shack up with much younger women are actually the answer to longevity. Who knew?

According to a new study conducted by Shripad Tuljapurkar and Cedric Puleston of Stanford University, when men mate with women who are eight or more years younger, it increases the life span of both sexes over time.

Sound confusing? Here's the deal:

Scientifically speaking, once people can no longer reproduce, they cease to have a biological purpose. For women, the "wall of death" age, as evolutionary theorists so cheerfully call it, is about 50. But men - and here's where the testosterone kicks in - can reproduce into their late 70s, so long as they have good genes and, well, good equipment.

So, when an older man mates with a young woman, he's essentially postponing death. And his long-life genes - you know he's got them if he can have kids at that age - get passed on to his children.

"Men who have children at a late age help to make natural selection work to protect human survival, because they are passing on more genes. It's just the way we've evolved as humans," Puleston says.

So old men making babies may bolster human longevity in the long term - but what's the immediate excuse for the ancient-man-trophy-wife match? According to Dr. Mark Liponis, author of "UltraLongevity: The Seven-Step Program for a Younger, Healthier You," young women can give a much-needed boost to their older partners' immune systems.

"Being close to someone makes your immune systems very alike," he says. "And an older man's worn-down, tired immune system will improve simply by being in contact with a younger person who is more energetic and healthier."

Still, a young wife offers more than mere health benefits.

"An older man/younger woman couple is the best kind, and more divorced men are choosing women 10 or 20 years younger the second time around, because they can," says R. Don Steele, author of "How To Date Young Women for Men Over 35."

"But it's important to keep in mind that it's beneficial to both the man and the women." Steele says that women want a wise, settled and rich man, while men want impressionable and youthful women - it's a two-way street.

"He offers security - and she boosts him up, improving his mood and blood pressure, helping him to live longer."

While some women may disagree with the anti-feminist tendencies of such a match, others might argue that it defines feminism.

"Women are choosing the men they want to marry - they aren't being selected," says Helen Fisher, an anthropologist and author of "Why We Love."

"When choosing an older man, she is getting someone who is settled, has a network and money and can take care of her. Plus, if she has children with him, her children will acquire some of the genes to his longevity."

Power Words in Dating


The way to a woman’s heart is through her ears! Meaning – what you say can have a huge impact on how a woman feels about you. So guys, here are some power words to use in common dating scenarios. These will help you woo the woman you have a crush on. We got this from several psychologists interviewed by Rodale publishing.

So let’s say you’re asking her out for the first time. You might typically say, “Want to go out to dinner on Friday night?” Instead say this: “Want to go out for Thai food Friday night?” What’s the big deal about mentioning Thai food? You’re creating an experience she can visualize. So unlike the standard “Wanna have dinner?” – you’re engaging her imagination and putting her in the moment. She’ll see you two sharing Pad Thai and be more apt to say ‘yes.’

Okay – so she said yes to dinner and now you’re at the restaurant and the entrees have arrived. You’d like to offer her a piece of your meal because it’s delicious – but also because her accepting a taste means psychologically that she’s accepting you in a way. So normally you’d say, “Want some pasta?” Instead say, “Want a taste of my pasta?” It works because words that describe actions or senses make the offer more appealing. So it’s not “Want a spoonful of my dessert?” It’s “Want a bite of my cheesecake?” You hear commercials use this type of “active” and “sensory” language all the time.

The date is over, it went well, and you want to secure date #2. In the past, you might have said, “Are you free next Saturday. There’s a concert in the park.” Instead, this time say, “I’d love to see you again. Maybe we could we try getting together next Saturday because I have tickets for a concert.” You may think that proposal sounds wimpy because you said “maybe we could try” but what those words do is give the woman a chance to say ‘yes’ without feeling pressured. Saying “because” – as in “because I have tickets” is the magic word. According to psychologists, people agree 66% percent more often when they hear a phrase with “because” in it. Why? Because people like hearing the reasoning behind the request.

Manhattan Singles events
Manhattan Single

Friday, November 23, 2007

Singles Mingle at the Tree? Ice Skating

Would be interested in an informal mingle to see the Christmas Tree and Rockefeller Center and then go ice skating afterwards.

I am thinking of either a Sunday Afternoon on December 16th (not to worry football fans, since the Giants are on at 8 PM and the Jets are already out of it) or Saturday, December 22nd.

Are you interested and do you have a preferred date?

Rules of Attraction

New Rules of Attraction


Guys, when it comes to wooing a woman – avoiding the things that’ll scare her off is just as important as doing the things she likes! So here are some new rules of attraction from Rodale Publishing.

The first rule: Connect quickly! According to a study by MIT, first impressions, good or bad, are formed almost immediately. The best way to make a good impression is to find something in common right away – whether it’s your love of the Green Bay Packers or your dislike for sushi. Even though one is a negative, you’re still proving that you have something in common. The worst thing you can do when it comes to first impressions? Talk her head off. Women want three things from a first impression: Confidence, chemistry, and conversation. It’s not about a long conversation, it’s about a memorable one.

The next rule of attraction:Make your friends her friends too. So steer her over to your group and introduce her. It proves to a woman that you respect her – because you wouldn’t introduce a woman to your friends if you weren’t genuinely interested. When you do, say something like this: “Hey guys, I want you to meet Carrie. Her ears are still recovering from my karaoke.” Self-effacing humor shows you’re confident enough to laugh at yourself. The worst thing you can do: Back the woman into a corner by herself. That’ll make you seem possessive, scary and threatening.

One more rule of attraction: Compliment her on something specific and unique. According to Canadian researchers, women are most receptive to praise when it reveals one of their uncommon personality traits. So tailor your compliment to her by paying attention – try something like, “Wow, you’re a school teacher? You must be an amazingly patient person.” The worst thing you can do: Give her some cheesy compliment about the way she looks. Say, “I like your halter top” and you’ll remain just another dateless chump.

NYC Singles
NYC Single

How Men Drive Women Crazy

Guys, there are some things we do that drive women crazy

You may not want to hear about it, but "Netscape.Com's" relationship expert - Laura Snyder - wants you to know what they are. She says generally speaking, women are pretty happy with men. But there's always room for improvement. Are you guilty of any of these charges?

You have no manners. Without mentioning any specific bodily functions, you get the idea. While they're happy that you're so comfortable around them, women would prefer you to keep your private habits a little more private.

You can be a total slob. Women notice everything! Dirty fingernails, stains, holes in your clothes. Plus there's your dirty laundry all over the floor and the way you drink the milk out of the carton. Not a way to impress a lady.

You have selective hearing. You tune her out and only hear buzz words like “football” or “food.” Make sure you take the time to really listen to her.

You're not observant. Women want you to notice if they cut their hair or lose weight. They want you to notice if they're wearing something new, even if it seems like they're always wearing something new. And they especially want you to notice if they're acting funny even if they say “nothing's wrong”.

You treat her like your friends. You can get away with wisecracks, corny jokes, and macho behavior when you're out with the boys - but she wants to be treated a whole lot better than your friends. If you wouldn't want someone treating your Mom or your kid sister that way, don't do it to your girlfriend. So there you have it guys. The ladies have spoken.

NY Single
NYC Single

Thursday, September 13, 2007

What does that phrase mean?

The following article comes from It is about common female phrases and how to interpret them. This post is your chance to ask about both male and female phrases and ask readers for advice on what it means.


Learn to Decode Common Female Phrases
Guys. If someone compiled a dictionary full of “female-to-male” translations, you’d be the first one in line to buy it, right? Well, here's a piece on how to decode some common female phrases, courtesy of Rodale Publications.

The first confusing female phrase: “I’m between relationships.” What this really means is “I’m interested in you, but I haven’t made up my mind, yet.” Basically, she’s not sure if she wants to date you. Maybe she was hurt in a past relationship. Or maybe she’s worried dating someone will take focus away from her budding career. However, if she thought you were completely repulsive, she probably would’ve said “I don’t have time for a relationship.” So although she’s put up a wall, there’s an open window in that wall. So how can you get through that window? Invite her and her friends to a barbecue at your place. If you can win over her friends with your sparkling wit and unavoidable charm, she’ll probably give you a shot.

“I’ve been dying to see that movie!” Translation: “Ask me out!” Guys! She’s not gushing over “The Kingdom” for her health! Communications professor Dr. Narissra Carter says any unsolicited desire a woman expresses about a movie or a new restaurant is often an invitation to ask her out. So guys, if she says she’s dying to see a movie, you’d be wise to say “Me too! How about we go next Friday?”

“I’ve been out a couple of times with this one guy, but we’re not exclusively dating.” What this means is: “I’m dating a little, but it’s nothing serious. So if you impress me, I might date YOU exclusively.” Guys, how should you handle this one? Ask her to help you shop for a tie. Shopping is something you’d do with a boyfriend or girlfriend. So if the two of you participate in a relationship-type activity, she’ll naturally picture the two of YOU in a relationship.

Long Island Single; NYC Singles

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Catcalls- Another reason why it is hard for men to approach


June 28, 2007 -- 'HEY baby, if beauty was a crime, you'd be locked up for life!"
"Come on, hot stuff, how short does that skirt go?"
"Damn, why you got to keep walking like that?"
Why yes - it is the height of catcall season, again.
Now reaching full swing as summer heats up, the women of New York are facing the come-ons of construction workers, businessmen and the occasional 4-foot-tall man freestyling his love supreme.

At the very least, it's nice to know: The experience is universal.
"You could be wearing a paper bag and still get street harassed," says 26-year-old Emily May, one of the founders of Holla Back NYC, an organization dedicated to fighting back against catcalling. "A lot of women like to turn around and say, 'Would you ever do that to your daughter or to your mother?'"

Started in September 2005, is dedicated to catching pesky catcallers in the act. How? With the click of a camera phone, women around the world are able to snap photos of street harassers and then share their personal stories online.

"We encourage women to use their street smarts," May says. "And if the situation seems dangerous, there's no benefit to taking it any further."
However, most of the time, she says, many guys just don't know any better.

"It can be a really effective response to confront them because it demonstrates to them that this is not OK," she says. "We want to give women a response to street harassment. It's an epidemic you have to take down bit by bit."
With the interest of educating fries-and-shake-loving men everywhere, here's our bit as The

Post presents the "best of the worst" catcalls from around the city.
And, men?
Next time you want to give a special shout-out, just remember dear old mom.

* And They Say Romance Is Dead

A guy on the street passed me and said, "Someone's getting laid tonight." I'm not sure if he was complimenting me or bragging. I'm sure someone somewhere was getting laid that night, but I was on my way to book club. Another guy said as he was passing me, "Hey cutie," then once he was behind me said, "I'd eat that ..." That's moving a little too fast for me. I was like, "Slow down, guy with a bag full of cans. If you don't cool it, this is not going to happen!"
- Amanda Melson, 31, Manhattan

* They Were "Spinal Tap" Fans, I'm Sure
I was walking toward a group of construction workers sitting on a bench, when they all started shouting out my score: "TEN! TEN! TEN!" As I walked by they ogled my butt and said in unison: "ELEVEN!"
- Kambri Crews, 36, Queens

* Yes, But What College Was It?
One morning, I was coming back from my run around Central Park. I walked by a deliveryman who was unloading stuff at the corner bodega. "Girl, you look fine," he said. "How much do you cost?" "What?" I said. "How much would it cost for me to get with you?" I was wearing running shorts and my college T-shirt. Apparently, though, I looked like a hooker.
- Cecelia, 30, Manhattan

* Wait Until He Gets to the Paper Towel You Bought
I go to the 94th Street Duane Reade, and it's raining. It's pouring outside. I'm buying dry cat food. "Miss, you need an umbrella?" says the Duane Reade cashier, and he wiggles his eyebrows like this is a sexy thing. "I've got an umbrella back at my apartment," I say. "Not like the umbrellas I've got here. I've got an umbrella that would be sooooo nice for you," he says. Then he asks me if I have a Duane Reade club card. "Yes I do," I say, and I fumble through my bag looking for it. "Oh yeah," he says. "I'll give you a Duane Reade club card all right. I'll give it to you all night long."
- Ginnie, 23, Queens

* And That's Just What They'll Tell Their Grandchildren, Too
A crowded F train pulls into the West Fourth Street stop, and a very attractive woman in a business suit steps in. Immediately, she catches the attention of a young gentleman who looks like Snoop Dogg and sounds like Busta. He cries out, "Damn, your booty fine!" and then proceeds to expound upon this thought, unleashing a veritable tidal wave of nonstop street poetry, describing every last detail of how fine her body was and just what he would do to it, given the chance. For five stops. Finally, at York Street, she casually rises, puts a finger to his lips and hushes him, slips her number into his hand and remarks, "You had me at, 'Damn, your booty fine.'" And with that, she disappears into the cool, Brooklyn night air. I like to think they're married now.
- Benari Poulten, 29, Manhattan

* I Wouldn't Mess With This Chick
It was a few years ago. I was uptown in Washington Heights, a block or so away from where I lived. I had heard one too many "Mira, mira, mira"s that day. There were three guys hanging outside the bodega when I was on my way to get a pack of cigarettes, and one of them was saying, "Hey mama, can I take you out tonight? You are beautiful, God bless you." Giving me the look up and down and eating me up with his eyes (gross). Fed up, I turned around and looked him in the eye and proceeded to ask him if he would "like to go back to my place and [bleep]?" The poor guy looked so surprised, and had no idea what to say. He and his friends all had slack jaws at this comment, and he was stuttering. I responded to the stuttering by saying, "That's what I thought." They never bothered me again and were much more pleasant the other times I saw them.
- Molly, 25, Manhattan

* This is What's Called "Reverse Psychology a Tu Madre"
I was walking down Prospect Park West last summer when these teenage boys lounging in front of a bodega hissed "Ay mami" and flicked their tongues out at me. Since I have fair skin and red hair, they assumed I couldn't understand them. Were they surprised when I wheeled around and said, "¡Si yo me parezco a su madre, su padre tiene suerte!" which means, "If I look like your mother, your father's a lucky man!"
To tell you they all stood there with their jaws gaping open does not even begin to do it justice. And then one of them smacked the one who did the catcalling on the head and said, "See, I told you she was Puerto Rican." Ha, snag!
- Michele Carlo, 46, Brooklyn

* Catcall No. 9
I'm Chinese, and I was walking down the street when this random white dude came up to me and said: "Hey pretty. I'll be your John if you will be my Yoko." As much as I appreciated the Beatles reference, I turned him down.
- Cathy, 20, Manhattan

* Someday This Is How The Mideast Crisis Will Be Solved
I was crossing Park Avenue when a guy wearing baggy jeans and a shirt stained with paint and plaster said: "Very nice ... sexy." So I turned to him and I said, "I'm actually fully aware of how much more powerful I am than you are, but nice try anyway," and I continued walking. He stopped. I stopped. And he smiled and exclaimed, "Damn, girl!" and high-fived me. He must have gotten it, too. I accepted his high-five and smiled back at him, and said, "Have a good day," and waved. He said, "You too, sweetie, you too."
- Livia Scott, 31, Queens

* We Represent the Lollipop Guild ...
Recently my sister and I were walking around the East Village at night when this 4-foot-tall, baggy-clothes-wearing guy came out of nowhere and began following us halfway up the block, continuing on about how he would take either one of us shorties cause he was easy like that. Yup, "easy like Sunday mornin', mmm shoot." After a few more "mmm shoots," "dangs" and "da'amns" he finally closed with, "Yo, check it out. I don't need to be the champ, I just want a shot at da title!" We actually turned around and shook his hand and thanked him for his time.
- Ali Jesinkey, 28, Brooklyn

* FYI, She's German, and She Looks It
I'm walking past a building site on the Upper West Side when one of the workers calls out "Hey Swiss Miss, come milk my udder!" (FYI, I'm German and look it!)
-Stephanie, 39, Manhattan

* The Best Community Watch Story Ever
While waiting outside a bodega late at night in the rain, a much older man circled my umbrella and gave a low whistle, saying, "Why you all by yourself? Come party with me! I got a bunch o' guys all havin' a good time!" I smiled and politely explained that I was waiting for my husband, at which point said husband walked out of the store and we headed home, only to run into the guy a block later at our building. Turns out we're next-door neighbors.
- Jennifer, 30, Manhattan

* Let's Call This the Anti-Catcall
Years ago, I was waiting for the subway with a friend, and some guy came up to us and was telling her how beautiful she was. I think he compared her to Audrey Hepburn, and then turned to me and said, "And you look like that person in those Richard Pryor movies." I'm thinking there must have been some hot woman in some of his films. And he says, "I know! Gene Wilder!" Ouch. Well, at least he's funny.
- Allison, 27, Brooklyn

* And Now He Has Some Idea What It's Like To Be Tom Cruise
During the blackout in August 2003, I was strolling around the West Village, arm-in-arm with my boyfriend at the time - who happened to be very good-looking. As we were walking down Charles Street, a group of gay guys were hanging out together on the stoop of a brownstone. Suddenly, one of them shined a flashlight at the two of us and yelled out: "Ooh, he's hot. Drop the bitch and make the switch!"
- Laura, 38, Manhattan

NYC Speed Dating

Monday, June 18, 2007

What does the word Friend mean?

Can Men and Women be Friends?
I hung out with my friend Lisa last week and we got to talking about the topic of men and women being friends. Lisa said "You know, you should really add an option on the scorecards at the speed dating events for a friend category in addition to the yes/no."

I said, nope, been there, done that, and I almost had a riot on my hands. A year or so ago, I had added that option based on several user comments that one of my competitors offered it. After about a month, I removed the option because the men were furious.
At an event, a woman thought a guy was very "nice", but just was not interested in him romantically so she selected the friend option. The guy got his results, saw he matched with the woman as a friend, emailed her, and then got really annoyed that she did not want to go on a date. Guys just don't want to hear that "you are very nice, but just not for me."

That being said, Lisa confused me a little more (when it comes to understanding women, it is not very difficult to confuse me). She said that doesn't know after 5 minutes whether she wants to date someone, and that is why she wanted the friend option.
Wait a minute here! As far as I am concerned, the word friend means that you are very nice, and I think you are a great person, but there is no chance that we are going to date or get into anything romantic. According to Lisa, friend means that I want to get to know you a little better before deciding whether to date your or not.

Semantics issue? What do you think of when you hear the words, I want to be friends? Jay's definition or Lisa's? (Lisa is not your typical woman, she doesn't look at a guys shoes when meeting him and considers me a metrosexual, which is the furthest thing from the truth). So I really need some more opinions here.
By Jay Rosensweig- NYC Singles, Long Island Singles

Sunday, June 03, 2007

Tips on How to Make a "Clean Break"

The following article comes from

Here’s the scenario. You break up with your boyfriend or girlfriend. But then you decide to ‘try again’ and get back together. Then you break up again. Then you get back together. Well, this vicious cycle isn’t good for either partner. Why? Because you’re both stuck in a relationship that makes neither of you happy. So here are some tips on how you can make a ‘clean break.’ These come from Dr. Les Parrott, author of the book Love Talk.

Use direct language. Saying something like ‘We should take a break’ gives the other person hope that the relationship could work out in the future. It may seem mean to say ‘I don’t want to see you anymore,’ but it’s even worse to give the other person false hope.

Tell them what’s wrong with you. When someone doesn’t want to let go, they’ll assume if they change, the break up doesn’t have to happen. So tell the other person whythe relationship won’t work. But make it about you. Say something like ‘I’m too lazy to be with a go-getter like you and I’m not going to change.’ This way, your partner won’t assume you’ll come back if they fix all their bad habits.

Don’t be friends! Planting the idea of friendship means you won’t make a clean break. Tell the person you both need to move on for good. Emotional divorce is crucial in break ups, and friendship won’t achieve that.

Don’t relapse! If you run into your old flame somewhere – and you’re tempted to kiss them – don’t do it! How can you resist? Think about what will happen after the kiss. You’ll probably get back together, and get into that vicious make up / break up cycle again. These negative thoughts will make kissing your ex less enticing. And avoiding these romance relapses will allow you and your old flame to move on and meet someone who truly makes you happy.

Speed Dating and Singles Events from NYC, Long Island, Queens

Sunday, May 27, 2007

What are Horoscopes, anyway? And what do they have to do with relationships?

What are Horoscopes, anyway? And what do they have to do with relationships?

Horoscopes are a description of the ‘energies’ that are most likely to be swirling around during the time period for which the horoscope is written. Are they accurate for everybody? No, not all of the time. That would be impossible. A horoscope that is written for the entire population born under one zodiac sign can only provide a theme for the month (or week, or year). While some people find that their horoscope applies to them some of the time, most of the time it is just describing the situations that may present themselves, and opportunities that are most likely to appear. Astrology becomes very personalized and is a much more accurate tool for personality analysis and prediction when a specific date, time, and location of birth are used to draw up a person’s unique Birth Chart.

Everything astrological can only be used for entertainment, and by people over eighteen years of age. The legal reason that every astrologer has to add this disclaimer to his or her work is because although there are thousands of years of research and practical use behind astrology, no one has ever been able to figure out why it works. Astrologers know that the positions of the planets in the sky at any given time will most likely correspond with a specific event on earth. But until the day comes when we find out exactly why astrology can be so uncanny and accurate, there are laws to protect consumers from seeking the advice of astrologers, psychics and the like, in place of counseling by a licensed medical or mental health professional. In short, astrology and horoscopes are supposed to be fun! They are supposed to be interesting, maybe a little mysterious, and they can be immensely entertaining. And the most common reason people seek out astrology and horoscopes is to find out what they can expect in love and relationships!

In twelve years of doing readings, I have noticed that most of the people who come to me for astrology and tarot readings are people who are seeking something in the way of love and partnership. They want to know about their partners, or when they will find a suitable partner, and what kind of partner is suitable for them. But the key will always be to have a good time with it, take it with a grain of salt, and see where the information leads you. I hope you enjoy these romance and partnership horoscopes that I have written for you, which are based on what the planets will be ‘doing’ in the month to come. They cover all kinds of partnerships, including romantic, social, friendship-oriented, and work relationships. After all, soul mates are everywhere. And if you have any questions about your personal birth horoscope, contact me, so that we can have some fun looking into what the stars say for you!

Vanessa Calderon is a registered nurse on hiatus. She currently practices astrology and reads tarot by phone, and in person in Great Neck, Long Island. She loves giving seminars and providing “psychic” entertainment. Her specialties are relationships, compatibility and career readings. She also practices Reiki energy work and teaches Reiki classes at the same facility where she does her readings.

For more information about Vanessa’s Seventh Sense Astrology, and the AFK Reiki Center, visit .

Your Romance and Partnership Horoscope For June 2007from Vanessa Calderon (Seventh Sense Astrology)

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)
Your ruling planet, Mars, will remain in your sign for the entire month of June. Feeling frisky? Probably…and assertiveness is your ally. Aries are known for their energy and courage, so use yours wisely to get what you want this month. A beautiful triangle of planets in fire signs right now is working in your favor during the first half of the month, so smile and don’t be afraid to approach people you might want to get to know. During the final week of June you will be feeling the intensity of another triangle of planets, which could bring answers about emotional issues, and an enlightening moment, which answers questions about what you really want.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20)
Your ruling planet, Venus, also happens to rule love and affection, which is why you are so cuddly and you have an eye for beauty. As Venus leaves the emotional sign of Cancer this month and moves into Leo, you notice the energy picks up on the dating scene and it’s time to get out there and do something you haven’t done in a while, or something that you have never tried. Interesting and spirited people can be found outside of your comfort zone, so get out there. At the very least, have fun watching other people entertain you with their antics and their contagious enthusiasm.

GEMINI (May 21 – June-21)
Happy birthday to all of you June Geminis! As the sun is crossing through your sign this month, it is tugging away at Jupiter, the planet of luck and expansion in such a way that takes you just where you always like to be: in the middle of a great conversation! If you go out and socialize, June will be the month to meet someone who is not only your intellectual equal, but who can teach you things you don’t already know (which isn’t much…). You should be meeting lots of interesting people, anyway, right through to next year, while Jupiter is moving through your “polar partner” sign, Sagittarius. “Learn, love, laugh” should be your motto.

CANCER (June 22 – July 23)
Venus is leaving your sign in the first week of June, Crabs, and Mercury has made his way in. This is an advantage to Cancereans because you are the emotional tides of the zodiac and when Mercury is placed in your sign, people tend to think more with their emotions than their heads. This is a language you can comfortably understand. Use temperance, however, so that you don’t communicate your emotions too impulsively, as Mars adds his fire to the mix up until the last week of the month. After that, you intuitively know all the right things to say.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)
You are normally the center of the party, Leo, but many Lions have been more reserved during the past year. Luckily the current dose of Jupiter and Mars at a lovely angle to your sign will make you feel more like getting out and enjoying yourself this summer. Venus in your sign in June has you looking your best. Oh, and that lucky Jupiter is going to stay in your house of dating and romance for quite a while. For the time being, focus on the social and networking aspect of your nature while the sun is in Gemini. At this time of year, you are likely to have opportunities to make some really great friends. The Venus factor we talked about earlier increases the likelihood that one of these new friends or contacts could lead to romance.

VIRGO (August 23 – Sept 22)
Uranus, the planet of surprises, has been slowly traveling through your solar house of partnerships over the last couple of years, no doubt leading you through some lessons about love, and other types of partnerships as well. That being said, the configuration of planets this June seem to be emphasizing career and issues at home, making you feel socially out of sync unless you make time for yourself to go out and live a little. It is times like these when you are really craving the stability that you need in your partnerships, so for now, look for company that has a more friendly, dependable tone to it. You appreciate your friends very much now and they seem to intuitively know what kind of scenery will cheer you up, and how to lighten the load.

LIBRA (Sept 23 - October 23)
Libra is the partnership sign, and since Venus has been in Cancer you have probably been feeling extra sentimental and gooey, maybe even to the point where you have been distracted at work. Venus is moving into Leo this month, which fires you up and gets you going again. This is especially exciting because you also have Mars, the planet of assertiveness and action, in your partnership house. This combination lightens the mood and urges you to take a more active role in several areas of your life. Try to steer clear of romance gossip at work, though, while Mercury, the planet of communication, opposes Pluto, the planet of secrets, in your career sector. Don’t be shocked if a secret crush gets revealed.

SCORPIO (October 24 – Nov 21)
You are in a groove that could lead you to find romance in places where money can be made, so keep an eye out for someone with whom you have received training, have done work with recently, or are working on a project with. Bosses and people in authority are also romantic prospects for you in June. We all know about Scorpio’s magnetic powers, and with Mercury currently tracking through your house of higher education and knowledge, and with the angle it is making to your ruling planet, you are even more apt to impress people this month with your knowledge, charm and wit. People will also be noticing the loving and romantic side of you while Venus crosses over your public point this month. Show off your softer side!

SAGITTARIUS (Nov 22 – Dec 21)
The first ten days of June are ripe for fruitful interactions with people you can totally relate to. If you meet too many of them, don’t worry, you have the opportunity to deepen a connection with a romantic prospect by the end of the month. It is the middle part of the month that will really tug on your heartstrings. You will be connecting with thoughts, people and cuisine from for off places, and will get the itch to travel. Sagittarius is the sign that is associated with foreign lands and foreign cultures, and you will notice these themes popping up this month more than usual. By the end of June, you will feel less dreamy and more attached to reality, which will give you the insight to determine if an attractive person you met recently is really worth your continued attention.

CAPRICORN (Dec 22 – January 19 )
Are people more emotional this month, Capricorn, and are you comfortable with it? You are very good at categorizing things, so if people seem to be less able to communicate efficiently, figure out a way to deal with it. Mercury is in your opposite sign, in your solar partnership house, and it will go retrograde in June. This means that you will have to hold on a bit longer until emotions come out of the clouds and back to earth. Be sensitive to partners, or even old flames who rehash old subjects and issues you thought were settled. Practical as you are, trust your intuition, because you can use it toward the end of the month to get answers to any questions you have about partnerships, romance and love. You will be in tune with what is in your best interest.

AQUARIUS (Jan 20 – Feb 18)
Your sectors of self-identity, and partnerships, have been going through a cosmic overhaul over the past year and will continue to do so for a while. The sun is passing through your romance and dating house in June, however, so that means that the fun side of your romantic life is highlighted, instead of the serious side. To add to the happy news, Venus will be entering your solar partnership house. It is going to make a nice angle to lucky Jupiter in your sector of friends, hopes and wishes. Optimism is your best friend right now. Get out and enjoy your social activities, for you are in a position to find friends and love in the same places. You can go back to contemplating life and love later on.

PISCES (Feb 19 – March 20)
Is it possible to find love (or at least, intense like), through a family member, or at a family function? Yes, and you might have that opportunity in June. This is especially true during the first week, before Venus moves out of your romance sector, and into the sector where you provide service to your fellow man. You are the compassionate type, but be sure that you strive for equality in your partnerships this month, when the urge to fall for someone who needs your help might be strong. Toward the end of the month, a feeling you had about someone you know through work turns out to be true, or an issue rears it’s head and everyone has no choice than but to acknowledge that you were right.